So this week we had a problem from Goretti. A problem that raised so much discussion around me, in fact my desk neighbour, Grace, says she overheard a couple of ladies discuss it on the street during the week.
Just to get you in the loop, Goretti happens to have this really jealous and possessive boyfriend. They live together and he watches her every move as well as monitor all her friends, especially male ones – relatives too. Once he was so angry that she came home a little late. He was so bitter he burnt her new clothes and cut her braids! We threw the problem to you for advice and the advice and counsel was overwhelming!
What’s still mind-boggling though, is the way about 80 per cent of the responses were asking Goretti to stick around, hang in there, pray and talk because things might change. It’s disturbing to imagine that this lady is not even married to the guy and she’s already suffering. What then would happen if he got or had exclusive rights to her? Wouldn’t he end up scooping out her iris or chopping her legs so she could sit in one place?
I am no activist or strong feminist but I believe no woman ever deserves to be beaten, not when you say you love her. Yes, love may be blind but let’s not have it get literal. When they talk about patience and tolerance, it doesn’t mean one party turns into a punching bag. Two years together may seem like a long time to throw away, but let’s think about how much suffering Goretti would have to endure 10 years later. Seeing the same responses from the ladies, I ask myself if women still subscribe to the archaic notion that it’s a sign of love when a man hits you. You don’t have to wait to lose an eye before you can see the light. Take a look at page 7 and see if you’d have advised better. Cheers!