Impressively, the church of Christ is increasingly noticing that while a good Christian may now be well versed with every Bible page, praise song and charitable deeds, she remains largely hapless about the common questions in life.
Questions that can easily lead a God-fearing person astray or cause himher to stumble. And lately sermons are thankfully addressing that: self-help or inspiration. Sunday, April 6 found me in Mavuno church in Kampala. Mavuno is Kiswahili for harvest.
There, at the pulpit was Pastor BX (Benson Xavier) from Mavuno church Kenya, who is visiting Kampala, and I wished he were preaching at Kololo Ceremonial grounds or any place where as many women as possible could fit in.
Well, at least I can share this in writing women please take serious note on this. This month and the last, we have been going through a series called ‘Finders Keepers’, and particularly this Sunday was about, What Men Wish Women Knew.
And they are just five things.
1. Men need respect
Yes, it might seem pretty obvious and old-skool but the same way we need and crave for affection is the way men crave respect. It is a need. BX said that need can be expressed by speaking highly of the man, holding him in high regard and praising him.
He may even not be worthy of praise he may be cheating on you and you know, but find something even if small that you can praise him about. Even if it is tying the shoe laces of your kid (okay I thought of that myself) but you get the drift. Find something he does that can fit to get praise.
Yes, the night was lonely as he was out with his boys, and maybe some girls, but hurt as it may, welcome him home, instead of locking the door and hiding the key, commanding the house help not to dare open for him.
And for the single ladies, if you are dating a man you cannot respect, don’t waste his time. Look for a man you will fully respect to be your husband.
2. Men aren’t mind readers
Usually when a woman sulks and says nothing is the problem, she expects a man to read the signs, and maybe ask, “what did I do?” Well, here it is women: men don’t read minds, they read newspapers, or so said the pastor.
And that may be one of the reasons men hate the three words: “Can we talk?”
3. Men can’t be fixed by a woman
Here it is in our faces, lasses spare yourselves the novenas, the overnights, the bible classes and trips to a pastor in the next city.
Men are not going to be fixed by you anytime soon. They can be fixed by God but not following your timetable. The pastor said if you have not yet married a man, take a good look at him first.
4. Men marry simple girls
Oh yes, everyone is attracted to a Kardashian kind of lady, but hey, that is not a ticket to keeping your man. You may want to be the bad, wild girl and think you will hook the man of your dreams, but that does not mean you will keep him.
Men marry women they respect. Dignify yourself in front of your man and the rest will fall in line.
5. Not all men are bad
Ah well, music to my ears. Just know what you need from a man, ladies have the minimum requirements and walk away with those. Men are not manufactured so that the ones with defects are thrown away. T
hey are created and are not perfect. Wait to get a raw material, not a finished product, and work together with him till you flow in one wave. Wow. And that is the part where I pinched myself and thanked God, I had heard that message.
I have learnt so much from the year I have been fellowshipping with these people. I can just compare this church to a vast ocean of wisdom.
I hope to get more and more as I become the fearless influencer I am envisioned to be. The church is based on the vision of turning ordinary people into fearless influencers, and I can gladly say I am on my way.
Source : The Observer