In this country and perhaps most countries, weddings are not a joke.
They are serious affairs, which have even irked our president, who has commented on how much money is often wasted on these events.
Are they a celebration of the love of a couple or a status symbol? Who truly knows? What many of us do know is weddings can bring out the worst in people, particularly the bride.
In our time, we must have all come across at least one bridezilla. This is that friend, sister, daughter or wife-to-be, who somehow transforms from reasonable human being to angry monster while discussing what colour of tablecloths to have on the wedding.
Now, of course, we must be patient, calm and understanding this after-all is the biggest day in her life. Simultaneously, you too do not want to end up running mad and staying silent while putting up with her drama.
So, what are the best tips for survival especially if you are told to wear a dress you hate? Are you at the receiving end of her mood swings and are facing her demands?
Whether you are a husband to be or a bridesmaid, I have some aice for you.
Firstly, have some compassion. This is her wedding and hopefully the only one she will ever have. So, if she is obsessive and crazy, do remember she will return to her normal self. However, you do not need to be a martyr especially if her demands get in the way of your life.
So, from the get-go, be honest and straight about what you can and cannot help. Putting down boundaries is essential otherwise, the other person is left sitting with unrealistic expectations of you. Also, in terms of money and anything you will need to spend, stand your ground and state clearly what your budget is. If she is a true friend or the right life partner, she will understand.
If you are a friend, it may also be an idea to have in mind some excuses for when you cannot deal with any wedding madness.
Now, we are not encouraging you to lie, but if after a week of dress fittings, make-up consultations, cake tasting and hearing her constantly complain about her mother-in-law-to-be, you have had enough it’s ok to make an excuse for why you cannot make an appointment with her. If you are her fianceacute, this is an opportunity to practise communication for married life.
Another suggestion is to take her out once a week for a relaxing drink or drive and say no wedding talk allowed. Tell her it’s so she has some time to de-stress, which really means that you will too.
For those times when it does get too much, complain and talk about it to those who are not involved. This allows you to get stuff of your chest while being able to avoid gossip and drama.
Most importantly, remember, bridezillas are created when there are stressful situations around. So, do what is in your power to minimise that stress. Sometimes, it is as simple as keeping her calm and supporting her choices.
Finally, try not to take anything personally this is probably one of the few times in a girl’s life where she can be fully self-obsessed and so might be ignorant of what is going on in your world. Just remember, you are friends with her or fell in love with her for good reasons and that is hopefully who she really is.
Source : The Observer