Now more than ever, I hate internship programmes. I do not like working for free, but now I have an even stronger reason for hating those mostly-exploitative programmes. On paper, the idea sounds good but ask any one who has gone through it, and you realise that it is a source of free labour for most employers. After doing my mandatory internship, I would have laughed you out of town if you had told me to do another internship. So you can imagine my shock when I found myself reapplying for internship — at the same company.
I had gone to pick up a letter of completion from my former supervisor when I happened to see the new interns heading to the boardroom for briefing. And lo and behold, there she was Jemima! In an instant, I knew I had to be in this company. Before I knew it, I was asking the guy if I could reapply for internship. Of course, he accepted. I mean, who turns away free labour? But of course, I would not be getting the allowances since I was not a ‘real intern’. No surprise there, I did not want their handouts. My mind was with that girl I had just seen, the one I found out was called Jemima. Well, being an intern with her would give me access to her daily, my prehistoric brain reasoned.
The next day, I was at the office, convincing my supervisor to make me the Intern supervisor since I was technically not a supervisor. In addition to me not having to do any work at all, I would decide who was allocated to do what, and specifically, determine how Jemima spent her days. I wanted her to be very close. My wish was granted. Again, who turns away free labour? Jemima soon became like my personal assistant, and I have no idea why the other interns had any problem with that they probably thought I was favouring her, because we were dating. But, truth is, I was not really making any progress. She feared me as her boss, she could not see me as a man with needs she could sort.
Once I asked if I could take her out for coffee, she politely declined, saying I was her senior, that it would affect our work relationship. Can you imagine? So I was forced to tell her the truth. She relaxed a little, and I started to make some progress. Internship was not so bad after all.
I calculated that in a matter of days, before the internship ended, I would have convinced her that I was the man for her. We did a couple of dates, until one day I arrived at the slave camp and found a letter of dismissal waiting for me I had been fired! For fraternising with my workmates! Can you believe that? How do you fire someone you do not employ? I was working for these guys for free, and they could not even let one good thing come to me?
Jemima had also been given a warning letter, and for her, that was the worst thing to ever happen to her. She associated me with being fired, and she did not want anything to do with me, not even after I was no longer ‘working’ with her. So I lost my dignity, and the girl I desired. I am waiting for the next person who asks me to volunteer, for anything.
SOURCE: Daily Monitor