Josephine Abbo, a banker says, “I was in love with my best friend for three years. We did everything together. Went to the movies and had road trips. He would even stop by to talk to me at work and texted me every night about which episodes of movies he was watching. He told me all his problems and so did I.”
“We gave each other gifts and everyone thought we were dating. He even encouraged the image when we were out in public. But it never went anywhere. Instead of telling me he simply wasn’t attracted to me we continued a fake of couple-like behaviour. In the course, he started dating someone and I felt I needed to be blunter than I had already been. I told him I loved him and he didn’t talk to me for a year. He got married in August.”
Kim Olver, author of Secrets of Happy Couples, reveals, “You know you’ve been friend-zoned when your ‘friend’ consults you on what to do on dates with other girls, tries to hook you up with his friends, and basically treats you like one of the men.”
1. She has serious relationship issues and talks about them. Joseph Kangaho says, such a type of woman makes them feel like everyone knows that you are clingy and that you easily get jealous because you openly admit it. Plus, you’re nasty and you talk about your relationship issues to anyone with ears. It’s so much drama that even the thought of sleeping with you doesn’t sound like fun.
2. The girl who is like one of the men. “You like beer, you actually follow a sports team and you dress like a man!” says Elias Tumuramye, an accountant.
Also, a woman who has like one real female friend, is fun to hang out with and always gets invited to football matches. That is worrying. You are basically a young brother and that’s a friend zone touchdown.
3. The nice girl. Just like how nice men finish last, nice girls don’t get the corner office. He likes talking to you, he texts you in the daytime and he would even let you clean his couch . His mom probably would love you too, but you’re just a nice girl with a nice personality.
4. You’re not his type girl. People have types and they exist for a reason. Maybe he dates girls from a certain region of the country and you are from the total opposite. Maybe he likes rugby fans and you loathe that type or can never dream of yourself on a rugby pitch.
5. His friend’s ex-girlfriend girl. People date and people break up, but real friends don’t sleep with each other’s baggage. No matter how cute, smart or funny that baggage may be. Even if he’s got what you need, he just a friend. That is boundary enough to keep you away from intimacy.
Emma Rutaro a psychology student says, “You are what you attract. So if you’re constantly being friend-zoned, change the behaviour into one that has swag and confidence, one that doesn’t come across as friendly but one that reeks of, ‘Friends not welcome – only suitors allowed.’”
It is all about the attitude! You can’t control a man’s type or what he’s attracted to, but you can control the signals you give off. If he’s hanging out with you as friends, he already likes you – all you have to do is make it clear that you want him to like you as more than a friend.
You’re just friends if…
•You hear phrases like: “I can talk to you about anything,“ “You‘re really a nice guy,” “You‘re like a brother to me,” “You‘re my best friend,” and “You understand me.”
•You finally work up the courage to ask her out and she tells you: “I don’t want to jeopardise our friendship,” “I like you too much to go out with you,” “I don’t want to risk losing what we have,” and so on.
• She tells you all about her problems with men.
• She asks you for aice about the men she’s attracted to.
• She tells you excitedly, “I just met this really great guy!” Askmen.com
SOURCE: Daily Monitor